Apr. 3rd, 2009

perceptionally: (we're coming closer now)
[Filter: Private, in Atsirian]

I'm already tired of them, aren't I. All three. They are the closest I'm likely to get to what I've been searching for, but -- the lessons you learn early always hold some truth. Be careful what you wish for; you might get it.

Saeren is precisely what Mother would have chosen. I can see that clearly, very easily. He is genuine and polite, soft without simpering. And not an original thought in his head. Derez is too eager, like a boy half his age. This is not the sort of game you enter into when you've not properly learned the ropes, and I won't apologize for that summary when it's warranted. ... Sir Connor, conversely, knows the game very well. He intrigues me, but he would not be hard to deconstruct if I were to dedicate the time, and then what would he be? A dull, surly copy of Saeren. What a joy.

And if I head back to the pool and the nets it invites another age of deliberation. No one would say a word, of course. Certainly not to my face. But I can see their thoughts, and some have become none too kind.

They think I do not know myself, but -- that's not the case. I know precisely what I want. I always have. I suppose it's even lucky in some ways that it doesn't seem likely to present itself here, after all.

Nevertheless.

[Filter: Joseph, in Atsirian]

Certain matters seem to be progressing rather well. I've received a number of panicked apologies, all so full of contrition and regret. And promises to do better, of course. That most of all.

But one thing does concern me.

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perceptionally: (Default)
Westa

October 2014

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